Toastmaster International Speech # 10 (Graduation Speech)

Let us all be Wise Men – We are almost there!

Was Albert Einstein a wise man because of his intelligence?

Did Mother Teresa’s spirituality make her wise?

Dear Fellow Toastmasters and Distinguished Guests, Good Afternoon.

“Not all intelligent people are wise — somebody can be intelligent and yet not wise,” Psychiatry professor Dilip Jeste said. “A wise person usually has some spiritual traits —— in a sense that a wise person is compassionate, empathetic and altruistic like a spiritual person. So a wise person is both intelligent and, to some extent, spiritual.”

Dear Fellow Toastmasters and distinguished guests,

This means both IQ and Emotional Intelligence are needed for one to be successful. Regular Intelligence is about one’s Linguistic, Logical-Mathematical, Spatial intelligence, etc, while Emotional Intelligence is about interpersonal and intrapersonal intelligence.

It is said that IQ gets you hired and EQ gets you promoted. Poor EQ may even get you fired.

According to Coleman, the author of the book entitled "Emotional Intelligence", EI means the capacity for recognizing our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves, and for managing emotions well in ourselves and our relationships.

It has been found that those who are having good IQ and high EI have greater successes than those having only High IQ.

Dear Fellow Toastmaster and Distinguished Guests,

I am sure that many skills we develop as TMs are part of the Emotional Intelligence or also known as Peoples Skills. For example the listening skills are highly valued in both Toastmasters and Emotional Intelligence.

In my opinion, Toastmasters can very easily become wise men. As mentioned before, to become a wise man you need IQ and EQ. Let us do some calculations. If we assign equal weight to IQ and EQ, we already have 50% of becoming a wise man on IQ, for the simple reason we have been hired due to our IQ. I believe being a Toastmaster, we already have opportunity to gain a half of the remaining 50% which is assigned to EQ, i.e. 25%, which makes a total of 75%.

You need only another 25% to be wise man. Why don’t you commit yourself to become a wise man today, if you are already not one.

First type of Peoples Skills, is to have an approachable personality.

Do you know how I make myself approachable to others? I simply smile. Remember, this is a genuine smile. By smiling you can look approachable without uttering a single word. In addition, I make gestures that others feel comfortable with me, I greet them in their own language. Salam Aleikum, Kaif Halak Habibi, How are you? Kehale saab, Magandan Omaga, Anon balita? If you smile and communicate with them intimately and warmly, you will easily become an approachable person. I try not to pass anyone known to me without greeting, at least with a smile.

The second skill is to be a good listener. As toastmasters we have already developed this skill to a great extent. Remember this is part of the 25% I mentioned earlier. I always focus on what others trying to tell me. I try to create the atmosphere not disturbing to our conversation. As you know our mind works faster than we speak. Tendency would be to respond. But I patiently wait for my turn. I focus on the message. Ask questions from the speaker so that he could elaborate. Finally, I reiterate to him what I have understood and give him a chance to correct or add. By being a good listener you will allow the speaker to raise his ego and you will earn more respect from him.

The third peoples skill is to know how to speak to people. First thing when you are talking to someone, you should show interest , genuine interest at that. I try to select a common topic that would interest both parties. For example, if I see TM Hameed Hussein, I will talk cricket. If I see TM Awad, I will talk about Sudan. Others, I talk about their kids, their graduations, etc. I supplement my words with expressions such as “Wow”, “Great” or “Maash Allah”. Further, I start my conversation with his/her own words. This will establish a closer bond between the two parties and you will gain respect and attention from other party. I will always try to listen to the other party very carefully before responding. I always keep eye contact, which will add energy and warmth to the conversation. I always try to smile when talking to someone. It is worth more than thousand words. I always respect other party’s personal space and time. When talking to someone, I will maintain a certain distance in order not to disturb that person’s personal space. Also, I avoid asking questions from someone is hurrying away. I will wait for chance when the person will be free.

Another very important peoples skill is to be able solve conflicts. One thing I try to practice at home and office, when there is a conflict, is to concentrate on the current issue. I try not to relate the conflict to previous incidents or generalize the issue. I avoid saying that you have been always like this. This will complicate the conflict and make its solving more difficult. I always choose words and statements which are mild, factual and not anger-provoking. Listen well, when you do that you have a better chance of solving the conflict. A conflict cannot arise without mistakes committed by both parties. So, I always accept responsibility for mistakes from my side. This makes solving the conflict easier and encourages other party to accept their mistakes too. Always try to keep in mind that you are looking for a way to solve the conflict, through a WIN/WIN situation for both sides.

So, Dear Toastmasters let us all embark on the path of becoming Wise Men. Let us make this Wise Men’s Toastmasters Club. Remember you have only less than 25% to achieve.

Back to the Toastmaster of the Day.